master_simon: (High spirits)
Dr. Michael Simon Anders (aka Master Simon) ([personal profile] master_simon) wrote in [community profile] nexus_stables2006-07-08 06:00 pm
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[[Open to [livejournal.com profile] simply_ellie only.]] Warning: Language and suggestive

Dr. Michael Anders has a blindfold tucked in his pocket as he pulls up to Elise's apartment. His PINpoint is in the other pocket. As he parks and climbs the stairs to the lobby, he grins broadly. This is going to be the best surprise ever.
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[identity profile] simply-ellie.livejournal.com 2006-07-09 03:53 am (UTC)(link)
Shaking her head, she can't keep a sob from escaping. "I wouldn't have traded that day for anything." The tears continue, unabated. "If the only way to have met you was to have survived Matt, I'd do it again."

Her throat tightens again, not letting her speak as she begins to sob. The way he's touched her life has only been for the better, and if it weren't for him, and how kind and comfortable he'd made her feel that day, she probably wouldn't have taken a chance and submitted her application to the Tower.
master_simon: (Weary)

[personal profile] master_simon 2006-07-09 04:04 am (UTC)(link)
He pulls her back into his arms, hugging her tightly. "Oh God, Ellie, I'm sorry... I..."

...still don't have the right to tell her who I really am. When I see her tonight, as Simon, I'll have to ask, because it's only when she gives me permission in that guise that I can. Damn it... she needs to know!

He realizes that he's been rubbing his cheek against hers, and that his lips are seeking hers out, only a second before they'd meet. He freezes.

[identity profile] simply-ellie.livejournal.com 2006-07-09 04:14 am (UTC)(link)
Ellie freezes too. I don't want him to stop, but he has to. You are a horrible person, Ellie. Karma is going to find you. Shaking now, she's so upset with herself for wanting him to continue.

When she finally speaks, her voice is soft and tremulous. "Can we..." Swallowing hard, it's difficult to finish her sentence. "Can you show me around the stables now, please?"

There's no way she's going to be able to meet Simon later. Not after this. I'll need to text or call him, but I can't. Not tonight. He'd be so disappointed in you, if he were watching you right now.
master_simon: (There is no good here)

[personal profile] master_simon 2006-07-09 04:21 am (UTC)(link)
He swallows, and then gently lifts her to her feet, off of his lap. It takes more strength than it should and it feels like he's amputating a part of himself to do it. But he succeeds and, once he's sure she's steady on her feet, he makes himself stand, too.

"Okay." His voice is still very husky, and rather pained, but he manages. "I... I promise, Elise... I won't impose on you. I won't do, or say, anything in the office to make you feel uncomfortable. And no matter what, you are always welcome here."

Until he gets permission to reveal his real face to her, as Simon... this is what he has to do. What he was supposed to do from the start. Step back and not seduce her in their mundane lives.

Did you think courting her in both lives, being your own rival, was going to end any way but badly? You idiot.

"Lets... start over here..." He leads them away from the hayloft. In fact, he doesn't think he'll dare take her near that tonight.

[identity profile] simply-ellie.livejournal.com 2006-07-09 04:30 am (UTC)(link)
Even though it had been at her request, having him ease her off his lap feels like the worst separation she's ever had to bear. It's hard to meet his gaze again, wondering what he must really think of her now and the shame still burning brighly red on her cheeks.

"I... I know. And thank you, so much." Feeling sick to her stomach, she's so upset with herself that she could throw up. And that should be the least of your punishment for what you've done.

The marmalade cat is back, plaintively meowing. Picking it up again, it's much safer to hold the cat than reach for Michael's hand.
master_simon: (Run that past me again?)

[personal profile] master_simon 2006-07-09 04:32 am (UTC)(link)
Tonight. When I meet her tonight in the Tower... I'll ask her to let me take the mask off. She needs to know. Maybe if I drop the accent, she'll know enough to give me permission to show her the rest...

As he leads her over to meet the first of the horses, he makes that promise to himself.

[identity profile] simply-ellie.livejournal.com 2006-07-09 04:39 am (UTC)(link)
Following Michael's lead, she's loathe to release the cat just yet. It keeps her from hugging him or holding his hand, things that she shouldn't do again tonight. Maybe ever again, she thinks. But the urge simply won't go away.

As soon as I have a free moment, here or back in my apartment, I'm going to be the coward I've shown myself to be and text Simon. I can't see him tonight, maybe even tomorrow. Not until I get my thoughts in order and am ready to be honest with him.

What if I'm not able to do it?

Is this what living a lie is like?
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